A Passage Full of Quotes.

Yes, there is a nirvana: it is in leading your sheep to a green pasture, and in putting your child to sleep, and in writing the last line of your poem. - Kahlil Gibran

So....

is it true?

Is the true path to happiness and peace through the simple things in life?

It seems that we're taught this through out our whole lives, people are always coming up to you and telling you to "stop and smell the roses" or to "take your time".

But then again, those same people tell that "life is short" and that in order to succeed you must keep going.

Some people are....not lazy....but, slower in their approach to life.

Others thrive on controversy and and on a fast paced life.

I guess that, like all other things, enjoying the simple things in life, and taking you time, stopping to smell the roses, and other such things, are best taken in moderation.

Afterall, too much of a good thing is, well, a bad thing (or so I've heard....and so I believe).

Now a days, you can't really afford to take life lightly, and if you try to, then people will eat you up.

But...trying to make a living is no reason to not take a break and appreciate things like family, or a beautiful day. Doing it too much will depretiate the pleasure of being able to do it.

I believe that life should be lived in balance.

You need to get angry every now and then, it's good for you (!) but having a bad temper and flaring up at every little thing is not good for you.

I think you should always forgive people when they trespass against you, but don't always forget those sins. "Fear the goat from the front, the horse from the rear, and the man from all sides." - Russian Proverb

Yes, life should be lived in balance.

Yin and yang, good and bad, dark and light, salt & pepper.

Then again, I'm a bit of a cynic when it comes to life, so if I was you, I wouldn't take my words to heart.

THINK FOR YOURSELF

"So little trouble do men take in search for the truth; so readily do they accept whatever comes first to hand." - Thucydides

That's very important to me. That people think for themselves. As Confusius said, "He who learns but does not think is lost. He who thinks but does not learn is in great danger."

Hum de dum....thinking....

Ok, so let me think about something serious to type about. I really don't like going on about nonsense. Unless I'm trying to find a way to ease boredom or to busy my hands.

You know what they say:

"Idle hands are the devil's tools"

Although personally, I don't agree with that, not completely anyways....I was thinking about this and I believe that it's the idle mind that is Satan's greatest tool.

That probably sounds a lot deeper than it really is though. I mean, anybody can think up something as simple as that.

Most times, poeple don't want to, or believe themselves incapable of thinking about the profound.
The biggest question I guess is where to start.

On a skip from my mind...Humans are naturally selfish creatures, it's to be expected really. It's kind of like a survival instinct. At the beginning of time, you had to take what you could get, when you could get it. If there was food easily available, go get it, and it stands to reason that more that one person would go for the same thing more than once, the result of course being, fighting. There wouldn't be enough to go around for everyone, people were too premative or too desperate too really want to share anyways. Therefore, only those selfish and strong enough to fight for everything they needed would suvive. See what you need, take it!

And of course, as there were more luxurious things, or pretty things coming into play (like rocks or shells [just kidding]) that philosophy would change to see what you want and take it .

People are selfish and have been for ages;

the only right law is the one that benifits them

the only true justice is the one that sides with them

the only rightful king, is the one they put there themselves



People will never truelly be satisfied.



I'm doing it again...rambling that is....

Well, there 's not really much to be said. And I don't like to waste time at all.

That's really a bit hypocritical of myself though, because I do waste time. I don't like to, but man am I lazy.

(And here I go about to contradict myself again but....) I DID 90 PUSH-UPS LAST NIGHT!!!!

YES!

go me !

hahaha

I usually do about 70 at night, but, I wasn't tired when I got to 70 last night so I kept going, and then at 86 I started to slow down but I was determined to make it to 90. Which I did. So yay! ^^

I really must stop contradicting myself. I do it all the time. I can never say or think anything without some small annoying voice in the back of my head pointing out every flaw in anything I say or think. I'm constantly arguing points back and forth in my head. It does help me see issues from both sides, and I guess it keeps me fair whenever I'm mad at someone and helps me forgive them easier.

But dad-gum (!) if it isn't incredibly annoying!!! (and shut-up, I know I spelt incredably wrong, both times)

I'm not sure about the point of this entry

Well, I was......doing nothing really last night. But then the urge to get up and write came down upon me, so that's what I did. And I realized something, well, not realy realized because on some level I was always aware of doing it on some sub-level of my consciosness, but I'm rambling. What I "realized" I had been doing is that, when writing, I was writing in a rather paranoid fashion. I've always written as if I expected someone else to end up reading my thoughts, and so I've never really written anything too deep, ot too telling, and furthermore, I found myself constantly trying to explain my thoughts, why I felt whichever way I felt about whatever particular topic I was writing about. Of course, I had always been aware I was doing this, but it never really occured how...paranoid...such an action is. I know that that is one of the reasons I've never been able to write in a journal.

Although...I once had a journal on my computer where I was completely able to let everything out. Then I'd save the file and move it into the recycle bin. Of course, I had typed in big letters across how no one but me should read this and I threatened anyone who did betray my trust in such a way that they'd suffer in ways unimaginable (!).

>.<

Okay, so I admit it, haha, I'm a completely paranoid being.

But really, everybody is paranoid on some basic level. Everyone's always afraid of being caught doing something weird, inappropriate, unexpected (sp?), ect..ect..and the list goes on.
And it's basic human nature to want to look your best and be appreciated. Although, I think I don't care so much as that. Nope, I'm more into keeping to myself , having my privacy. I don't really care a bit what others think about me, just as long as I don't have to explain myself to them. It's much easier to say that you're fine then to say something is bothering you and then have people hounding you constantly and asking you what's wrong.
Feh.
I've never been any good at writing introductions or conclusions. Once I get writing I do pretty good, but the beggining and ending have always been the most tedious part of writing for me.
So, Don't feel offended if I don't bother to write an ending to my entries and instead stop
abrupt--

Hello. Enjoy reading about whatever I happen to be typing about. This one entry itself is just another one of my many experiments on what I can and can't do on blogspot. Wouldn't it just be lovely if I had it in me to just keep writing and writing and writing and writing and........................................no I'm joking. I agree that if this thing went on forever it would be really annoying, by the way, I know this thing is going to be moved down further on the page eventually, so if you happen to want to read this from the beginning but catch it in the middle, refreshing the page should help. As if you probably couldn't figure that out yourself. But then again, sometimes people over think a situation and when that happens, they miss the simpler answer. I do that sometimes in math. I guess that technically (I know I probably spelt that wrong) but still, I could make this into one of those rather funny, but extremely annoying things that go on forever and never seem like they'll end. you know I could start counting: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 112060 OK. so I skipped a few numbers, writing one of those things would annoy me as much as reading it would annoy you. I'm sure that sounds a bit....hypocritic (?) (I don't know, not quite the word I was looking for) Still, I'm sure everyone is sick and tired of reading this, either that or their tired of me assuming to know them so well as to say that I know that they're sick and tired of reading this. I don't know, you could be different and actually enjoy reading all of this mindless babble from a tired teenager who truthfully has nothing better to do except sleep and who actually probably should be asleep seeing as it's 10:38 pm. Haha, anywho... 1 2 3 Just kidding. Yeah...Well, I've already written two other blog entries tonight. One of them I think is actually pretty good, I ramble in it, but that's because thoughts were just coming out while I wrote there isn't anyreal order to it. But still, if you can organize it in your own mind, it might prove a bit interesting, more interesting than you might find this one anyways. I wonder what'll happen if I press "enter" and start a new paragraph....only one way to find out right? ()
Well I did it, but now I'm going to have to wait forever just to see if anything actually happens. All wel, it's not like I really have anything better to do. Sooooo.....................................BYE! ^.^
Yay guess what something interesting did happen, you'll be able to read it now, hahaha, you'll figure it out, just watch, oh yeah, and
DON'T READ AHEAD, KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE TOP LINE TILL YOU GET TO THIS PART!!!
hahahaha
What fun!

Alas, it didn't work.

I do believe that the title says it all. My last entry was (overall) to test backgrounds....all well...back to the drawing boards.
I'd just thought that I'd admit that I've lost this battle, but, at the risk of sounding cliche, I wanted to say I've yet to lose the war. ;)

I think I've fixed it!

If you read my last blog entry, you might recall that I mentioned how I liked writing in black, but how that color never shows up on because of the dark blue color of my blog background.
Well, I also wrote about how I thought that I could fix that, this blog is just, really, me experimenting with adding a background html to the...(not sure how to explain it...but I'm sure many people know what I'm talking about.....Actually, many people probably think me mentally diasabled for not thinking of doing this earlier. haha.)
Anywho, if this does work, then it will open up a lot of oppurtunities (my gosh my spelling sucks, I'm sure of it) for future blog entries.
Yay me right?
Haha, anyways.......*sigh* there really isnt much to do or talk about (yes I know i should have put one of these ' in the word isn't, but while I can write this long explanation explaining that I should have done it, I'm too lazy to actually go back and fix it. Go figure huh? I don't know, maybe, nvm, I....nvm.
Hmmm....
~=~=~=~=~+~=~=~=~+~=~=~=~+~=~=~=~+~=~=~=~
Well, I guess that it's really too late at night to write/type either an amazing or inspiring blog, right? I did type one of those before. I liked it, would have liked to keep it, but I don't like opening, to people I know anyways, especially, and, there were just too many thoughts and feelings in it and while... I don't know....anyways, that was back before I had discovered the "draft" button, so I deleted it instead.
Talk about pshyco..haha..losing a piece of work that you were fond of and spent a long time writing and in which you were actually paying attention to the way you worded things, and then deleting it all, just because you didn't want your friends to read it. Of course they already had, and I don't know, I've blocked their responces from my mind, and they, just like all people do, have forgotten about it, of course. I mean, they only read it once, and then it was gone, two days after showing up.
If my friends did something like that I'd probably forget too....it's...human nature afterall.
To forget those things that make us uncomfortable, and let's face it, who doesn't get uncomfortable when discussing religion or...political views...or just feelings in general?
I've often wondered how many lies we, as human beings believe just because the truth is uncomfortable, or is something we don't like.
No, I shouldn't say lies really, I should say "Untruths". That word fits much better.
That's how magicians/illusionists work really. They rely upon people seeing what they want to see. I've seen it, they misdirect your attention so that you miss what really happens and it leaves you thinking what they want you to think.
How many times have people in history's attention been misguided. I can think of quite a few right off the bat. "The Adventures of Paul Revere" and George Washington, ect, ect...
People believe what it is they want to believe. And when you question that belief, well, of course they're going to fight. It's like the fight or flight (oh what's the word ? ...it's late at night you see...) anywho...
Of course, if I continue rambling on like this people are going to start thinking that I'm some kind of conspirortist (spelling???). Oh sure, I believe in the possibility of conspiracies. yadda yadda
haha
Ahhh...
"Blessed are we who can laugh at ourselves, for we shall never cease to be amused"
How true is that?
I myself am proud to say that I try to never take myself too seriously! haha
I'm not even sure if I seriously believe that I never take myself too seriously.
Hmm..
Puzzle that out.
You know I'm sure that everyone is probably just sick and tired of my ramblings by now, I could just go on like this all night. Between you and me dear reader, I probably will be going on like this inside my head all night and I wont get a wink of sleep.
I really haven't been sleeping well this summer.
It's because of the lack of mental stimulas I recieve during summer. There's nothing to really make me think and therefore I'm up all night long, unable to think because I'm not mentally tired. I just keep on thinking about random...junk...that I never sleep. I've been like that ever since elementry school.
Oh how I truelly despise summer holidays.
Blech.
*sigh* In all this rambling nonsense, I'd forgotten the true reason I had started writing this blog which was just to test out the html I added so that the black writing would show up. Well, I guess it's time to test my hypothesis.
All well...
Good night fellow blogger.

Let us see....

Goodness me, It has been so long since I've written/typed in this blog. I really don't remember what it (my blog) looks like haha.
I think it's pretty safe to say that none of my friends ever write in theirs any more, or check out mine any longer. I'd be surprised if any of my friends even remember about it. Hmm.
I don't mind though. If I dont have to worry about what my friends will be reading then I have greater freedom in writing whatever I want to.
That's great as far as I'm concerned. It was hard writing in a personality my friends expect. You see, I have very different groups of friends, and I act differently in each group. Just like I act differently in front of my parents, or like I act differently in front of teachers.
It's sooo funny listning to my friends talk about me to each other, especially when they all have very different opinions about me. Very different opinions.
All well.
I do prefer being alone than with my friends (You know, between me and whoever else reads this).
Nothing agaist my friends, but I find it very draining to spend time with them. I enjoy it, but I'm always exauhsted (<-I know I spelt that wrong) afterwards.
Anywho. I guess I better write something teenager like, just to reassure everyone out there that I am a somewhat normal teenage girl...Blech, haha.
Yeah, I broke up with my second boyfriend. Well, I didn't want to hurt him, but I really wanted to break it off with him. I'm in High School, I don't want a serious relationship, especially with my second boyfriend. There's something you need to know, I'm one of those people who automatically scoffs at teenage "love". I just don't believe it. Now, if any teenager out there reads this and gets offended at that statement because you're in "love" with your current bf/gf, I'm sorry. That's just my opinion.
I believe love is something too strong for someone as young as us to truelly comprehend. Of course, I also believe in different types of love. Like brotherly love. That, you can feel easily enough. OR. Religiously (I know, I spelt that wrong too). I love everyone religiously, in a way that, I wouldn't want to hurt them or see them get hurt, and to where I have the ability to respect everyone, and forgive them if they sin against me. That I believe. But the love I don't believe a teenager can truelly feel is the kind that...you read see in romance movies, or something along that line. Actually, I truelly believe that few people, if they really think about it, love anyone that way.
Now then, when my boyfriend said he loved me, that's the way he meant. I couldn't laugh in his face, because I believe he believed that's how he felt. I don't believe he felt that, but I believe he believed he did. So, I can't laugh in his face. That's rude, and hurtful. So...I sorta cheated my way out. I used the word "love" in the whole religious context. But since he said it, I knew I had to break up with him. That might sound a bit cold, but truelly, it was for the best. Better break up with him then and there then let him get even more emotionally attatched and such, then end up breaking up on bad terms right? But still, I didn't want to break up with him. So I got him to break up with me instead, that way, he'd feel better about it, and I still got what I wanted. But no, don't worry, I didn't act like a jerk. I just told him I couldn't go out anywhere with him, till he felt that it would just be better if we sepperated (once again, spelling, I know..), he "didn't want to, but felt it would be better" ect.
Anyways...now is everyone convinced that I'm a semi-normal teen girl?
(Plus I was rather proud how I handled the whole break up, I thought I just might mention that ;) )...
Now then, let us see...What else to talk about???
I could tell you what I'm doing right now, but if I'm correct you probably don't give a rat's _ _ _ about that. I know I don't care what ya'll're doing right now. NO offence, but it's the truth, and I'm sure you can appreciate (<- spelling right? Eh, I'll have to look up correct spelling of some of these words >.<) the truth. I don't like all of that "beat around the bush" , "sugar coating" crap. Oh sure I believe in tact, but, be honest, seriously. (Even if your use of honesty leads people to believe the wrong thing ;). )
Haha, sorry. I'll admit, that does sound a bit hypocritic.
You know, I've probably jinxed myself by saying that none of my friends ever check these things any longer. I wouldn't be incredibly surprised if one of my friends does go to read this sometime this summer, and then I'll have quite a bit of explaing to do. Haha, yep, that would be just my luck...
Oh well, I'll deal with that when and if it comes...
I like writing in black, but because of my background it's a bit hard to read black. I'll have to see what I can do about that. Yeah...now that I think about it I'm sure that there's something I could do about it.
All well. I guess I'll finish this entry....I might start up a new one as soon as I enter this one, but I'm tired of writing in this box. Haha, sorry, I get bored a bit easily...ok...really easily. I need a fresh slate to type on because I'm feeling a bit claustrophobic writing on this one still. (I don't know if that makes any since to you, but it does to me).
But then again I might not start a new one. I don't know. I'll decide after I enter this one.

HOPE!!!

No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer which only Santa has ever seen.
There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. BUT since Santa doesn't (appear to) handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish and Buddhist children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total - 378 million according to Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census)rate of 3.5 children per household, that's 91.8 million homes. One presumes there's at least one good child in each.
Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west(which seems logical). This works out to 822.6 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left, get back up the chimney, get back into the sleigh and move on to the next house. Assuming that each of these 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false but for the purposes of our calculations we will accept), we are now talking about .78 miles per household, a total trip of 75-1/2 million miles, not counting stops to do what most of us must do at least once every 31 hours, plus feeding etc. This means that Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second, 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man- made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second - a conventional reindeer can run, tops, 15 miles per hour.
The payload on the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium-sized lego set (2 pounds), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight. On land, conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that "flying reindeer" (see point #1) could pull TEN TIMES the normal anoint, we cannot do the job with eight, or even nine. We need 214,200 reindeer. This increases the payload - not even counting the weight of the sleigh - to 353,430 tons. Again, for comparison - this is four times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth.
353,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance - this will heat the reindeer up in the same fashion as spacecrafts re-entering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy. Per second. Each. In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them, and create deafening sonic booms in their wake.The entire reindeer team will be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second. Santa, meanwhile, will be subjected to centrifugal forces 17,500.06 times greater than gravity. A 250-pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim)would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force. In conclusion -- If Santa ever DID deliver presents on Christmas Eve, he's dead now.
Rebuttal: (Jim Mantle, Waterloo Maple Software) Come on, ya gotta believe! I mean, if you can handle flying furry animals, then it's only a small step to the rest. For example:
As admitted, it is possible that a flying reindeer can be found. I would agree that it would be quite an unusual find, but they might exist.
You've relied on cascading assumptions. For example, you have assumed a uniform distribution of children across homes. Toronto/Yorkville, or Toronto/Cabbagetown, or other yuppie neighbourhoods, have probably less than the average (and don't forget the DINK and SINK homes (Double Income No Kids, Single Income No Kids)), while the families with 748 starving children that they keep showing on Vision TV while trying to pick my pocket would skew that 15% of homes down a few percent.
You've also assumed that each home that has kids would have at least one good kid. What if anti-selection applies, and homes with good kids tend to have more than their share of good kids, and other homes have nothing except terrorists in diapers? Let's drop that number of homes down a few more percent.
Santa would have to Fedex a number of packages ahead of time, since he would not be able to fly into Air Force Bases, or into tower-controlled areas near airports. He's get shot at over certain sections of the Middle East, and the no-fly zones in Iraq, so he'd probably use DHL there. Subtract some more homes.
I just barely passed Physics and only read Stephen Hawking's book once, but I recall that there is some Einsteinian Theory that says time does strange things as you move faster. In fact, when you go faster than the speed of light time runs backward, if you do a straight line projection, connect the dots and just ignore any singularity you might find right at the speed of light. And don't say you can't go faster than the speed of light because I've seen it done on TV. Jean-Luc doesn't have reindeer but he does have matter-antimatter warp engines and a holodeck and that's good enough for me. So Santa could go faster than light, visit all the good children which are not uniformly distributed by either concentration in each home or by number of children per household, and get home before he left so he can digest all those stale cookies and warm milk yech.
Aha, you say, Jean-Luc has matter-antimatter warp engines, Santa only has reindeer, where does he get the power to move that fast!
You calculated the answer! The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy. Per second. Each. This is an ample supply of energy for the maneuvering, acceleration, etc, that would be required of the loaded sleigh. The reindeer don't evaporate or incinerate because of this energy, they accelerate. What do you think they have antlers for, fighting over females? Think of antlers as furry solar array panels.
If that's not enough, watch the news on the 24th at 11 o'clock. NORAD (which may be one of the few government agencies with more than 3 initials in it's name and therefore it must be more trustworthy than the rest) tracks Santa every year and I've seen the radar shots of him approaching my house from the direction of the North Pole. They haven't bombarded him yet, so they must believe too, right?

Happy Holidays!!!

Personality Type Report for Snifflesno
Your Personality Preferences
INTROVERT
While you may not be anti-social, you do need (and deserve) your private time and space to retreat from the world. Unlike extroverts, you need to develop a concept of the world or some aspect of it before experiencing it. Too much socializing may sap your energies. Your energies are derived from exploring the inner world of ideas, impressions and pure thought.
INTUITIVE
While you do process information through your senses you add a twist to your processing by relying on intuition and serendipity. You look for undercurrents of meaning and abstractions in what you experience physically. You do not just see things just as they are, but as what they could be. While you may rely on common sense at times, you trust inspiration far more.
PERCEIVING
You like to have as much information as possible before making a decision. Putting off a final decision until the last moment does not make you uncomfortable. Indeed once a decision is made, a course plotted, you may feel a bit uneasy, because you feel bound to a certain course of action. You would much prefer to wait and see what happens. You enjoy the opportunity to improvise. Commitments are not etched in stone to you, and are changeable.
THINKING
You evaluate data and reach conclusions by using your ability to apply logical, objective analysis to the information before you. Your thinking process values consistency and fairness over the affect your decisions will have on others. You compare courses of action logically and make your choices based upon what consequences you see them as having. If there is something wrong with a plan, you are the one to ferret it out. It is important to remember that this does not mean you are cold and unfeeling, but that your thinking process is analytical.
Your Personality Type
Introvert/Intuitive/Thinking/Perceiving

You need your time to yourself. Indeed, you need this time so much that some may see you as being more than somewhat private, but aloof and unapproachable. You are iconoclastic, nonconformist by nature and capable of brilliant, original thought. Your analytical skills make you a natural problem solver. You are able to ferret out the contradictions and flaws in logic in almost anyone's thinking--including your own. You are independent, inquiring, and insightful.

In relationships you are loyal to those you care for, but you can become so absorbed in your work and inner world that you neglect them. You may show your feelings for others in ways that are too subtle for them to recognize. To be at your best you need to be insulated from conflict. Your appearance or that of others doesn't cause you much concern. You are non-materialistic. You can be difficult to approach at first, but are usually very accepting of people and their idiosyncrasies once you know them. You are a conceptual thinker, so it is only natural that a good conversation to you revolves around conceptual things and is devoid of chitchat. Many of the activities you love may exclude those around you--they are single person or two person pursuits. You will pursue knowledge throughout your life.

Famous People of Your Type:

Socrates, Rene Descartes, Blaise Pascal, Sir Isaac Newton, James Madison, John Quincy Adams, John Tyler, Dwight D. Eisenhower, Gerald Ford, William Harvey, C. G. Jung, William James, Albert Einstein, Tom Foley, Henri Mancini, Bob Newhart, Rick Moranis, Meryl Streep, Ashley and Mary Kate Olsen.

Occupations Suited to Your Type Include:

Archaeologist, architect, artist, astronomer, biologist, chemist, programmer, engineer, designer, historian, inventor, mathematician, musician, philosopher, photographer, doctor, psychologist, researcher, scientist, professor, and writer.

Ironic Ain't It?!

• What a nice night for an evening.
  
• Whenever I think of the past, it brings back so many memories.
  
• Some people say that I'm superficial, but that's just on the surface.
  
• On one hand, I'm indecisive; but on the other, I'm not.
  
• If there's one thing I can't stand, it's intolerance.
  
• The world's full of apathy, but I don't care.
  
• Perspective is in the eye of the beholder.
  
• Prejudiced people are all alike.
  
• Those who judge others will burn in Hell!
  
• Exaggeration is not all it's cracked up to be.
  
• I'm still not sure if I understand ambiguity.
  
• There's no such thing as nonexistence.
  
• Cooperation can only be reached if we work together.
  
• As far as I'm concerned, treachery will sometimes bring loyalty into question.
  
• It doesn't matter what temperature a room is; it's always room temperature.
  
• Avoid cliches like the plague.
  
• Go around the barn at high noon to avoid colloquialisms.
  
• Analogies in writing are like feathers on a snake.
  
• I always try to do things in chronological order.
  
• Exaggeration is a billion times worse than understatement.
  
• Death to all fanatics!
  
• An oral contract isn't worth the paper it's written on.
  
• Don't chew [or eat] with your mouth full.
  
• It's deja vu all over again.
  
• I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous!
  
• I always wanted to be a procrastinator!
  
• Rehab is for quitters!
  
• Don't be redundant by repeating yourself.
  
• Some people type so fast that forget to include
  
• I am becoming increasingly worried that there isn't enough anxiety in my life.
  
• I have this nagging fear that everyone is out to make me paranoid.
  
• Free advice is worth what you paid for it.
  
• Entropy just isn't what it used to be.
  
• I keep telling myself that I am a pathological liar, but I am not sure if I believe it.
  
• Not only am I redundant & superfluous, but I also tend to use more words than necessary.
  
• Honk if you love peace and quiet.
  
• Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
  
• Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
  
• Always be on the lookout for conspicuousness otherwise it's hard to tell if someone is inconspicuous.
  He doesn't have much of a reputation, or so I've heard.
  I disagree with unanimity.
  I have my doubts about disbelief.
  Avoid Alliteration. Always.
  Prepositions are not words to end sentences with.
  Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.
  I always wanted to be a procrastinator... never got around to it.
  Freedom of speech is overrated.
  

Jack Handey Philosophies 1 (Thanks to Brian for letting me use these philosophies!)

• Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis.
• Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself: "Mankind". Basically, it's made up of two separate words - "mank" and "ind". What do these words mean? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind.
• It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.
  
• I bet the main reason the police keep people away from a plane crash is they don't want anybody walking in and lying down in the crash stuff, then, when somebody comes up, act like they just woke up and go, "What was THAT?!"
  
• The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.
  I think someone should have had the decency to tell me the luncheon was free. To make
• someone run out with potato salad in his hand, pretending he's throwing up, is not what I call hospitality
• Ambition is like a frog sitting on a Venus Flytrap. The flytrap can bite and bite, but it won't bother the frog because it only has little tiny plant teeth. But some other stuff could happen and it could be like ambition.
• I'd rather be rich than stupid.
• If you define cowardice as running away at the first sign of danger, screaming and tripping and begging for mercy, then yes, Mr. Brave man, I guess I'm a coward.
• When you go in for a job interview, I think a good thing to ask is if they ever press charges.
• To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other.
• What is it that makes a complete stranger dive into an icy river to save a solid gold baby? Maybe we'll never know.
• We tend to scoff at the beliefs of the ancients. But we can't scoff at them personally, to their faces, and this is what annoys me.
• Probably the earliest flyswatters were nothing more than some sort of striking surface attached to the end of a long stick.
• To me, clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kind of scary. I've wondered where this started and I think it goes back to the time I went to the circus, and a clown killed my dad.
• Most people don't realize that large pieces of coral, which have been painted brown and attached to the skull by common wood screws, can make a child look like a deer.
  
• If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might if they screamed all the time for no good reason.
  
• Better not take a dog on the space shuttle, because if he sticks his head out when you're coming home his face might burn up.
  
• You know what would make a good story? Something about a clown who make people happy, but inside he's real sad. Also, he has severe diarrhea.
  
• If you're ever in a plane getting ready to take off, and you see another plane crash into something, just smile, because hey, there have never been back to back plane crashes.
  
• Sometimes when I feel like killing someone, I do a little trick to calm myself down. I'll go over to the person's house and ring the doorbell. When the person comes to the door, I'm gone, but you know what I've left on the porch? A jack-o-lantern with a knife stuck in the side of its head with a note that says "You." After that I usually feel a lot better, and no harm done.
  
• If you ever fall off the Sears Tower, just go real limp, because maybe you'll look like a dummy and people will try to catch you because, hey, free dummy.

Scientific Philosophies

When a cat is dropped, it always lands on its feet, and when toast is dropped, it always lands with the buttered side facing down. I propose to strap buttered toast to the back of a cat; the two will hover, spinning inches above the ground. With a giant buttered cat array, a high-speed monorail could easily link New York with Chicago.

Why Yawning Is Contagious: You yawn to equalize the pressure on your eardrums. This pressure change outside your eardrums unbalances other people's ear pressures, so they must yawn to even it out.

The earth may spin faster on its axis due to deforestation. Just as a figure skater's rate of spin increases when the arms are brought in close to the body, the cutting of tall trees may cause our planet to spin dangerously fast.

The reason hot-rod owners raise the backs of their cars is that it's easier to go faster when you're always going downhill.

The quantity of consonants in the English language is constant. If omitted in one place, they turn up in another. When a Bostonian "pahks" his "cah," the lost r's migrate southwest, causing a Texan to "warsh" his car and invest in "erl wells."

! ! !Lastly, I truelly hope that you don't believe a word of this! ! !

I'm SOOO Depressed!!! :

The Truth about Santa

After much research, we present the annual aeronautical engineers report on the theory of Santa:
No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer, which only Santa has ever seen.

There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. BUT since Santa doesn't (appear) to handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish & Buddhist children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total -378 million according to Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that's 91.8 million homes. One presumes that there's at least one good child in each.

Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with. This is due to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 822.6 visits/second. That is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has .001 second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left, get back up the chimney, get back into the sleigh and move on to the next house.

Assuming that each of these 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false but for the purposes of our calculations we will accept), we are now talking about .78 miles/household, a total trip of 75.5 million miles; not counting stops to do what most of us do at lease once every 31 hours, plus eating etc. So Santa's sleigh must be moving at 650 miles/second, 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a pokey 27.4 miles/second. A conventional reindeer can run, tops, 15 miles/hour.

If every one of the 91.8 million homes with good children were to put out a single chocolate chip cookie and an 8 ounce glass of 2% milk, the total calories (needless to say other vitamins and minerals) would be approximately 225 calories (100 for the cookie, give or take, and 125 for the milk, give or take). Multiplying the number of calories per house by the number of homes (225 x 91.8 x 1000000), we get the total number of calories Santa consumes that night, which is 20,655,000,000 calories. To break it down further, 1 pound is equal to 3500 calories. Dividing our total number of calories by the number of calories in a pound (20655000000 / 3500) and we get the number of pounds Santa gains, 5901428.6, which is 2950.7 tons.

The payload on the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium-sized Lego set (2 lb.), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight. On land, conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300lb. Even granting that "flying reindeer" (see #1) can pull 10 TIMES the normal amount, we cannot do the job with 8, or even 9, reindeer. We need 214,200. This increases the payload - not counting the weight of the sleigh - to 353,430 tons. This is four times the weight of the ocean-liner Queen Elizabeth.

353,000 tons traveling at 650 miles/second creates enormous air resistance. This will heat the reindeer up in the same fashion as a spacecraft reentering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy. Per second. Each. In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and create deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team will be vaporized within .00426 of a second. Meanwhile, Santa, will be subjected to centrifugal forces 17,500.06 times greater than gravity. A 250 lb. Santa, being very conservative in terms of guessing Santa's weight, would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by 4,315,015 lb. of force. If Santa ever DID deliver presents on Christmas Eve, he's dead now.

A Merry Christmas to one and all!!

> > >
> > > Subject: Wanna feel stupid today?
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > Quiz for Smart People
> > > The following short quiz consists of 4 questions and will tell you
>whether
> > > you are qualified to be a professional. Scroll down for each
>answer.
>The
> > > questions are NOT that difficult. But don't scroll down UNTIL you
>have
> > > answered the question!
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > 1. How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > The correct answer is: Open the refrigerator, put in the giraffe,
>and
>close
> > > the door. This question tests whether you tend to do simple things
>in
>an
> > > overly complicated way.
> > >
> > >
> > > 2. How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > Did you say; Open the refrigerator, put in the elephant, and close
>the
> > > refrigerator?
> > >
> > > Wrong Answer.
> > > Correct Answer: Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put
>in the
> > > elephant and close the door. This tests your ability to think
>through
>the
> > > repercussions of your previous actions.
> > >
> > > 3. The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals
> > > attend... except one. Which animal does not attend?
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > Correct Answer: The Elephant. The elephant is in the
>refrigerator.
>You
> > > just put him in there. This tests your memory.
> > >
> > > Okay, even if you did not answer the first three questions
>correctly,
>you
> > > still have one more chance to show your true abilities.
> > >
> > > 4. There is a river you must cross but it is used by crocodiles,
>and
>you do
> > > not have a boat. How do you manage it?
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > >
> > > Correct Answer: You jump into the river and swim across. Have you
>not
>been
> > > listening? All the crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.
>This
>tests
> > > whether you learn quickly from your mistakes.
> > >
> > > According to Anderson Consulting Worldwide, around 90% of the
>professionals
> > > they tested got all questions wrong, but many preschoolers got
>several
> > > correct answers. Anderson Consulting says this conclusively
>disproves
>the
> > > theory that most professionals do not have the brains of a
>four-year-old.
> > >
> > > Send this out to frustrate all of your smart friends.
> > >
> > > PS: Just the fact that I sent it to you should make you feel good.
> > >
> > > Are you as stupid as I am???

The Little Things:

As you might know, the head of a company in the world trade towers survived 9/11 because his son had started kindergarten.

Another fellow was alive because it was his turn to bring donuts.

One woman was late because her alarm clock didn't go off in time.

One was late because an automobile accident had held up the NJ Turnpike.

One missed the bus.

One spilled food on her clothes and had to take time to change.

One's car wouldn't start.

One went back to answer the telephone.

One had a child that dawdled and hadnt gotten ready in time.

One couldn't get a taxi.

Another was a man who had put on a new pair of shoes that morning and had to stop at a drugstore to get a band-aid because of a blister on his foot.

Just remember that the next time you're stuck in traffic, or miss the bus, or have to turn back to answer the telephone.

Think to your self that "This must be where GOD wants me to be at this very moment . . .

! ! ! ! ! GOD BLESS YOU ! ! ! ! !

Hey Peoples!
I have nothing to talk about, I don't even know why the heck I came to this website to write a blog! It just happened!

Well.....
I had my first ROTC meeting today (yeah, I know, school hasn't started yet, but I did!).
It was fun!
They gave us a folder with a bunch of papers and junk in it (I should probably be reading them right now, but....) The commander (ha, I think that's what I'm supposed to call him but I forgot {not good}), he seems nice though, although people say he'll be a bit....what's the word I'm looking for here?.....Ummm....how about ruder(?) later on when school starts.
We have a PT day tomorrow (PT stands for "physical training").
Personally I can't wait!!!
But that's just my opinion, some of the other students (I hate to say it but girls mostly) didn't sound very enthusiastic about it.

Today we got to learn about certain commands and positions. You know, like if someone said "Ten hut!" then we'd all straighten out put our ankles together at a 40* angle and not move a muscle (but we could blink).
The guy next (actually, if Stacie is reading this it might intrest her to know it was her cousin Tyler Fortner) to me started to pass out. It was because he had kept his legs locked while we were standing which blocked the blood from flowing to his head. The Commander had told us not to lock our legs, but Tyler must have forgot, it is kind of hard to remember.
Anywho....
I guess that I'm gonna go and maybe make a new blog, maye go do something else.
BYE! ! !

The Wise Owl

The wise old owl lived in an oak;

The more he saw the less he spoke;

The less he spoke the more he heard:

Why can't we all be like that bird?

I'm writting down quotes:

Don't worry, I'll stop at 50. haha

1. I'm a creature of habit...all the bad ones.
2. Tomorrow Never Comes.
3. Why is it that if an adult has the mind of a child tey lock him up, while children are allowed to run free in the street?

4. It's immpossible to give a hug without giving one back.
5. God gave us 2 ears and 1 mouth so that we could only tell half of what we hear.
6. A stranger is just a friend you haven't met yet.
(I'm not sure I agree with that 1)
7. You laugh because I'm different, I laugh because you're all the same.
8. Peace and trust take years to build and seconds to shatter.
9. The walls we build around us to keep out the sadness also blocks out the joy.
10. Insanity is a perfectly rational adjustment to an insane world.
11. You can close your eyes to reality, but not to memories.
12. A guy worth crying for will never make you cry.
13. You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.
14. A man can be destroyed, but not defeated.
15. If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for
reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed
16. Men are the only animals that blush, or have a need to.
17. Without education, we are in a horrible and deadly danger of taking
educated people seriously.
18. Imagination is more important than knowledge.
19. Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense.
20. Don't wait for the Last Judgment. It happens every day.
21. Remedy it, or welcome it: a wise man's only two choices.
22. Remember, if you’re headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns!
23. Enjoy when you can, and endure when you must.
24. Now that it's all over, what did you really do yesterday that's worth mentioning?
25. Laziness will cause you pain.
26. Never miss an opportunity to make others happy, even if you have to leave them alone in order to do it.
27. We have to live today by what truth we can get today and be ready tomorrow to call it falsehood.
28. You can tell more about a person by what he says about others than you can by what others say about him.
29. God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me.
30. Be careful not to drown in a mirage.
31. The heart of a fool is in his mouth, but the mouth of the wise man is in his heart.
32. All that is gold does not glitter; not all those that wander are lost.
33. They may forget what you said, but they will never forget how you made them feel.
34. Better bend than break.
35. Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.
36. Fail to plan, plan to fail.
37. (this is a long one)Patience serves as a protection against wrongs as clothes do against cold. For if you put on more clothes as the cold increases, it will have no power to hurt you. So in like manner you must grow in patience when you meet with great wrongs, and they will then be powerless to vex your mind
38. Argue for your limitations, and sure enough, they're yours!
39. Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.
40. What is right is often forgotten by what is convenient.
41. For the first half of your life, people tell you what you should do; for the second half, they tell you what you should have done.
42. Old age isn't so bad when you consider the alternative.
43. The time to begin most things is ten years ago.
44. Life is a long lesson in humility.
45. Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forewards.
46. Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.
47. I never think of the future. It comes soon enough.
48. The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education.
49. In peace, sons bury their fathers; in war, fathers bury their sons.
And Finally.....

50.The secret to creativity is to hide your resources.